Posts tagged ‘Feel The Fear’

September 10th, 2010

Fear: Confront It! Feel The Fear Friday #4

I cannot believe this weather! Usually we get a bit of a lead-in to the upcoming season but so far we’ve just gone full-steam ahead into fall! I’m perfectly content with this as fall, like with many people out there, is my very favourite season!

To celebrate, last night Alan and I went for a nice walk down to the Danforth for a hot drink and treat at Starbucks. I rolled with a non-fat Toffee Mocha while Alan went with the Pumpkin Spice Latte. Turns out the barista didn’t hear properly and made me a non-fat plain mocha instead. When I explained the situation she made me the proper one and then said I could keep the other for free if I wanted as they were just going to throw it out anyway. I hate wasting food so I took it. I figured that although I don’t like cool coffee I could at least try it over ice in the morning!


That means this morning I had a double treat!


OIAJ With Iced Mocha



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I was sad to see my jar of Dark Chocolate Dreams come to an end but excited to have my first hot oatmeal in a while! Sadly, I it was a failed experiment. I thought I’d try half a scoop of protein powder and completely RUINED it. It just tasted all mealy and powdery. :(



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That being said. My iced mocha turned out awesome! Funny, I can’t stand coffee that’s gone cool but you throw ice cubes in it and call it “iced” and I’m all over it!



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Tomorrow Alan and I are heading to Toronto’s Harbourfront for The Toronto Vegetarian Food Fair! This is one of my favourite festivals as I get to try all different types of vegetarian and vegan food and stock up on food you can normally only get at restaurants (like my favourite, the veggie drumstick!!!). There are also lots of samples, talks and cooking demos! I hear there’ll be a whole bunch of us bloggers there tomorrow so come and say hi!


Feel The Fear Friday


Last week I talked about how to be rational when you’re faced with a fear. That your fear is just you over-reacting to something that most likely will never actually happen.


This week I want to talk a bit about understanding your fear.


Simply put, if you want to overcome your fear, you have to understand and confront it. Both of these will help to lessen the fear because knowledge is power. To do this, you need to dig deep and ask yourself the tough questions. Ask yourself why you’re afraid and don’t accept your first answer as the answer. Many times the first answer is a cover answer for something deeper. What I do is to ask myself “why” five times.


When I first moved to Toronto it was because I asked myself why I was afraid to leave my hometown.


Answer #1: I hate the city. It smells and I’ll get murdered.
Answer #2: It’s unfamiliar. I’m a small town girl and I just prefer the small town life.
Answer #3: I don’t know anybody in the city. My family is here. At least I have them.
Answer #4: What if I can’t find a job or make any friends? I don’t want to be alone.
Answer #5: What if I move and I fail? I’ll be embarrassed and I’ll have to move back home just like I did before.


BINGO! I didn’t think I was worth much back then and thought of myself as a failure. But I wasn’t a failure. My problem was that I didn’t try! I thought of myself as so unworthy of success that I never attempted to try anything! I never fought for anything! By asking myself the tough questions and not accepting any answer as the correct one until I knew that I was finally telling myself the truth, I found what the real issue was.


At that point, however, you have to decide what to do with the answer when you get it.


It’s like Lawrence Fishbourne in The Matrix. Do you take the red pill or the blue pill? Do you allow yourself, armed with this new knowledge, to continue down the path you were on or do you decide to go in a different direction? You know exactly what will happen if you continue down the old path because it’s how you currently feel. Sure the new path is unknown but what if going down it leads you to happiness? What if it leads you to everything you ever wanted? How can you ever go back to the life you were leading when you’re faced with the possibility that everything you want is down that other path?


There is not a day that goes by in the last three years that I regret moving and starting my life over again. I know where I’d be if I didn’t and the person I am today is happy, confident and brimming with possibility.


It just starts with asking that one little question: why?


What fear did you bust through this week? What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?

September 3rd, 2010

Feel The Fear Friday #3

Although summer’s not officially over until the end of the month I thought it would be nice to take the time today and do a little visual summer recap! I had a pretty great summer filled with weddings, birthdays, races, outings and just plain fun and although I’m sad to see the summer end I am SO excited for the fall!

Goodbye summer, hello fall!

First, I had not one, but two weddings to attend in a six day period! Crazy!

The first was for a friend of the family!

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The second was for my awesome cousin! Doesn’t she look gorgeous?! She’s since moved to B.C. on me!

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I taught my niece the fine art of licking batter off the spoon and how much fun baking is (and that apron is mine from when I was a girl)!

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I met some new blog friends!

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I turned 31 and did it in style: at Medieval Times! Yeah!

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I went to Canada’s Wonderland!

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I participated in my first 15k race and lived to tell the tale!

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And had, quite seriously, the most awesome cupcake ever!

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Yup, it’s been a blast this summer! Now let’s get going on the apples, pumpkins, spicy smells and runs with long sleeved shirts! Yeah!

Feel The Fear Friday

Last week I busted through the fear of being more assertive when I have concerns! Even though I have yet to hear back about the situation, it was the act moreso than the outcome that I needed to get through.

This week I busted through my fear of my healthy life reversing on itself. I’ve come down with either a cold or some new allergy and have had quite the stuffy nose for most of the week as well as a couple of low energy days. I allowed excuses to win over and in-so-doing, I haven’t done any form of real activity since my long run on Sunday.

All of a sudden the negative talk started. I began to question myself as a runner, as a healthy individual and even got upset about my weight(!?). I felt I was being lazy and that healthy people wouldn’t do things like this. They’d suck up the stuffy nose and get out there regardless.

Last night I had a serious talk with myself because I knew the negative talk was getting out of hand. One week will not derail my life. I’ve had bad weeks before and I came out of them just fine and I will have bad weeks again.

I berated myself for not knowing what to do! I would never let anyone I loved do that to themselves so why was I doing it to myself? I didn’t know if I should go out and run or if I should just take it easy. I also didn’t know if I should go out and run in the humidity or if that would make it worse. So I took the more cautious road and stayed in. Either decision would have been fine but because I made the decision to not get off my butt, I thought I was being lazy.

Negative self-talk gets us no-where. It’s not conducive to healthy outcomes and only causes us stress, frustration and low self-esteem and nobody wants that, do they?

The truth is, I am much happier now than I was a few years ago and that alone will deter me from ever allowing myself to go back to the “old ways” of sitting around doing nothing, eating horrible food and treating myself badly. I have seen the other side and my life is better for it. Taking a week off just to be on the safe side is not going to ruin anything and, in fact, may just make it better.

Tip for Overcoming Your Fears

Be rational! If you find yourself being afraid to do something because you keep considering the worst case scenario, ask yourself how probable it is that it could actually happen. Also ask yourself what you would do if it did happen. This is the perfect time for you to come up with a plan if something doesn’t work out. Having a plan for a worst case scenario lessens the fear because you’ve already figured out how to deal with it!

Also make sure to ask yourself what the best possible scenario could be if you acted on your fear. Is there anything you can do that will help this scenario become the more possible outcome?

We normally fear things because we don’t know the outcome but rationally sorting through what all the possible outcomes are and coming up with action plans to either deal with it if it doesn’t work out or acting on the steps that will point us towards the more positive outcome helps us to rise above the fear and take those steps with more confidence!

What fear did you conquer this week?! Is there something you’re afraid of doing because of what you think might happen? Perform this weeks tip and see what happens!